In the span of only two months, I have graduated college, moved into a new home, started working full-time, and got married. Only three days back from our honeymoon, and I am definitely starting to experience what I term the “post-event slump.”
Parents, teachers, friends, and society-at-large all drilled into my head the importance of college. While my college experience was less than desirable, I stuck it out to the end. I have a degree! I can now check that off my life to-do list.
Next up, my fiance and I put a deposit down on our first home together. A town home, mind you, but still an investment. We moved into our new place the weekend after my college graduation. Find a place to live: check!
About two weeks after moving, I was bumped up to full-time at my previously part-time job. (All this while planning my wedding, of course.)
Then two weeks after that, we got married and drove to Florida for our honeymoon on the beach and Disney World. It was an absolutely magical time!
We have been home for three days, and today was my first day back at work. While I am extremely happy to be married and very much in love with my husband, I still find myself feeling glum. Why is this? Shouldn’t I be jumping with joy? I have achieved all my life goals! Or so society seems to tell me. But all these life goals: college, marriage, a nice home, etc. happened in only four years! Now what do I do with the rest of my life? How am I supposed to find out what I want to do? What comes next? What do I want to come next?
When big events like these happen in our lives, it’s hard to return to the everyday grind of life. We find ourselves feeling dissatisfied and bored. When did we lose the ability to just exist and live our lives not worrying about what happens next? (Or have we EVER had that ability?) Because no matter our best efforts, our lives will likely not go as planned. I know mine sure hasn’t, but I am very happy with where I ended up so far. So why am I experiencing so much anxiety for the future?
As I embark on my first few weeks of married life (which if I’m honest, does not feel that much different from before besides maybe more awesome sex), I am attempting to live each day to the fullest, even the ones I spend at work, cleaning, grocery shopping, paying bills…
I have a feeling my life will be wonderful no matter how much or how little time I put into pinpointing my plans for the future. I am just going to (try!) to sit back and enjoy the ride!